Archives for May 2014

Leaving 170 – Days 1&2 – Starter Fails + Pretending I Didn’t See You


I’d topped 170 lbs and some change and my fat fat pants were already getting snug – one week after I bought them! I knew I had to go full throttle or risk hitting 200 so I psyched myself up and blew some cash on hopes of slimmer days to come.

First – I got the Ab Circle Pro above. The fabulous ladies in my dentist’s office said it really worked and the advertising said it only takes “3 minutes a day!” PLUS look at that photo – it screams “WEEEEE – FUN!”

Not so much. With all my extra weight, it also cranked my back when I used it. And 3 minutes is a hell of a lot longer than you think when you’re out of shape. So – the days (about 3) using this don’t factor in this count.

Second – I joined weight watchers. I’m not counting those days either – because keeping track of everything you eat is tedious. But I’m trying. Sort of. I’m still paying the $40 a month – does that count???


Third – I hit yoga, that seemed a gentler way to work on the core. I did okay, but my thighs were too fat for the exercise above. You put a styrofoam yoga block between them to keep your knees facing forward – with the block in-between them my thighs were facing towards the side walls and not straight ahead. Yoga Fail. The teacher came over and nicely told me I should look for a slimmer block next time (which, of course, they don’t have available ANYWHERE in LA).

Fourth – The new YMCA in our neighborhood opened so I took a cardio class the next day. I saw a rail thin Korean friend I’d lost touch with – we’d met during real estate classes and got together a few times a year and then years went by. Embarrassed by my new frame I decided to just pretend I didn’t see her and hope she didn’t recognize me now that I’d super sized. Another fail!


She called out my name, we talked and I admitted that I felt awkward in my new body so I was hiding in the corner. Then we took a super hard cardio class together and I was bound and determined to keep up. I did. And I paid the price.


Luckily – a hot bath with the Milk and Honey Epsom Salts helped ease the pain. And afterwards you smell amazing. Like an actress on an afternoon audition. I swear they lack sweat genes or something. Going in the lobby to call their names, I was always amazed by the combo of heavenly smells and jealous vibes. Some major size-ups went on between them there.

I’m done with those size ups, can’t wait for my first size down.